I’ve realized I’m not as comfortable as I originally thought when it comes to sharing intimate details of my life. I think part of this is due to a recent medication change, coming off of a pain/depression med has caused some up and down craziness. I’ve been a volatile rollercoaster trying to speed off the tracks for a few months but honestly, I love myself more now. Even though it could be a few more weeks before I teeter out, I’m so glad to be feeling myself again. My hand hurts more but my personality is coming back in force. It’s a crazy thing to feel yourself evolving, knowing you’re only getting better is an empowering feeling. Unfortunately though, progress for me is extremely slow, but each day I get better at staying the course of progress.
I have BIG goals for 2019 and therefore I won’t have much time to blog this year. It’s time though that I focus my 20% of energy a day on Chill Network. I may not be able to do much yet, but so far I’ve been able to bring together almost 100 people for support. I’m hoping to see that number to continue to grow and I’ll finally be able to really spearhead my chill awareness movement that could help so many people. All I’ve ever wanted to do is be able to help people on a large scale and I think that path may finally be clearing for me to walk.
2018 was a great year for me. I learned I can live with pain, nausea, vomiting, constant fatigue, and other random pains/symptoms. I learned sometimes you have to push and other times you have to rest and only trail and error can tell you which. I was told my heart showed improvement for the first time in my life. I netted zero weight loss for the year but I can now do 5 squats no problem. I learned it’s the little things that become the big things.
I know this year will have its highs and lows. Tears will be shed and laughter will break silence, and all of life’s wonderful ups and downs will bring new joys and stressors. It’s okay though, for the first time in a long time, I feel like I’m ready to live again.
Fore Life 